So, what have I been doing since my Last Post?
I still
live in a hallway full of moving boxes, but I am slowly getting through them
and making my new home in Second Life feel like my home. It still feels weird
to me to be living alone and to be able to do whatever I want in second life
again. Before I go any further, I have been getting messages from people
concerned about what is happening to me in my real life. I want to calm
everybody down and say my real life is lovely. I am thrilled and will continue
to be satisfied in my real life for as long as I live. I'm blogging about this
situation concerning my second life and my second life breakup. Some people may
have a problem understanding my type of blogging, so I encourage you to read
the disclaimer part of this blog before you continue to have a better
understanding.
OK, now
let's move on.
Those of
you who have been following me for a while and following this blog for quite
some time know that I had a pretty nasty infected break About one year before
getting into this relationship, which has now ended. Still, with a hand on my heart and soul, these two relationships have been the
most damaging relationships I have ever had combined in real life and second
life.
After
getting out of this second-life relationship, I feel so unsteady, uncertain,
and self-conscious I don't know why; that's a lie. I know why: I let
this guy get too close to me. I did whatever he wanted to make him happy, which is
so out of character. I don't know why I'd let him get so close to me. It was
like every day was revolving around him.
He asked me
to stop blogging, and I did.
He asked me
to stop taking photos, and I did.
He asked me
to stop working in Second Life, and I did.
There was
so much I let him take away from me to make him happy.
I endured
quite a lot from this man. Of course, it was never physical, but the mental
side of it? Yeah, the mental side of it was so damaging.
He has asked
me to forgive him for the pain that he caused me, but his actions spoke louder
than his words, and they still do.
I have been
trying to get back to some form of normalcy in my second life right now. I plan
to return to the person I was before and make new friends.
I have been
enjoying the Black Friday sales. I picked up a new Lelutka head, One that I have
been watching ever since it came out, I think five years ago now, but I never
wanted to buy it at full price, so I finally took the plunge and bought it when
it was 50% off I think the lelutka sale is still going on so I might pop over
and by one more head before the sale ends.
I have also
been picking up a few bits and pieces for the baby I wanted, and that
store also had 50% off.
I'm pretty much ready for her to be here regarding the baby's needs. I feel very content with what I have for her.
As far as taking
a bit of "me" time, I have been enjoying being alone, decorating my house, and
watching movies within Second Life; watching movies is very relaxing, and it
helps me to put my thoughts in order or spark an idea for a subject that I want
to write about.
All in all,
guys, it feels amazing to slowly but surely be an independent woman again. I am going to embrace the time it will take for me to get there. It might go fast or slow.
/Tessa
